For your awareness, to constantly think “poor me” is to operate in poverty consciousness.
Do you go over “poor me”, “poor me” and “poor me” in your mind?
You could also be repeating the same thing to the people that you meet too.
“Poor me” is akin to having a victim mentality. You are in self-pity. A “poor me” syndrome arises especially when you are constantly pointing blame outwards. It could be the fault of your grandmother, father, the government, the economy and so on. It is always the fault of someone or something else except yours.
[Side-note] This post is updated as the content is still relevant today. Continue reading
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A money date is one where you are working on your finances; whether on your own, with your partner or team. It is one where you specify a day and time on your calendar for a money-related activity that is meant to help you consolidate, improve and/or strengthen your personal or joint financial position. It may be that you need to work on
budgeting for a trip,
creating a spreadsheet to monitor expenses,
discussing with your partner on financial options,
reviewing your earnings,
finding better ways to minimise tax,
paying down your loans,
moving of investment funds between accounts,
getting updated advice from your financial planner,
create a financial plan to help you manifest the lifestyle that you want etc.
By scheduling money dates on a regular basis, you are better able to identify gaps, opportunities and ideas instead of making any personal financial activity as a once-a-year event.
Would you like to be inspired by money healing stories?
Well, I’d like to share some that belonged to my clients. I have had the privilege of helping them attain a mindset breakthrough that resulted in a change in their finances. For a long time, they were struggling with limiting beliefs that blocked the flow of money and their ability to generate better income. Most carried emotional money wounds that stemmed from the past.
Their money healing stories are transformative. They had to confront their fears and release their attachment to beliefs formed since young. I’m thankful to my clients for giving me a firsthand chance to learn about how it is possible to rewrite our stories for healing and greater empowerment. To protect their privacy, I have used pen names for them.
Money Healing Story #1: Breaking Free of Glass Income Ceiling
No matter how much effort she put in, Annie couldn’t seem to break through her glass income ceiling for her business. She’s constantly having money worries and that she’d never have enough. While we were working together, Annie experienced an “aha” moment. She suddenly realised how her unconscious limit in earnings came about.
Her dad had struggled to make a living when she was young. Unfortunately, Annie internalised some of the messages he had shared with her about his money troubles. During our session, she “saw” the amount that was written on the cheques he had been banking in from his job. To her surprise, it was the same amount that she has been earning for a long time from her business.
Annie worked on letting go of her glass ceiling. She gave herself the permission to make more than her dad. Annie no longer limits herself on what she can earn. As a result of her inner work, she has been generating income breakthroughs ever since. Annie found herself attracting bigger and bigger deals for her business.
When it comes to healing money wounds, there are two important considerations:
1. Healing needs to involve the emotional layer.
2. Healing of money wounds is best resolved at root cause.
Let me explain more.
1. Healing Emotionally
The money behaviour or situation that you are in is influenced by what’s going on internally – your thoughts and feelings.
For some people, any talk about money tends to conjure plenty of negative feelings.
Feelings such as worry, frustration, sadness, anger and so on.
However, when emotions run high, they create a block or disrupt our energy system.
Our clarity and ability to process thoughts get reduced and we also find ourselves less able to take the necessary action that will help us improve our financial position.
Unfortunately, a block in our ability to manifest financial abundance can also impact our business or to get a job with a pay that we deserve.
Does your mind focus on scarcity and “not having enough”?
It’s possible to be focused on the lack and have poverty consciousness even if you have money in the bank and it doesn’t make logical sense to be counting the pennies.
This can happen if your reptilian brain or nervous system is activated in fight-flight-freeze mode and due to past conditioning.
If so, I’d like to invite you to work on letting go of the conditioning.
Tap along with me, so that you can let go of a lack mentality and align with abundance consciousness.
Let me know how the tapping session went for you.
Love and Abundance Always, Evelyn Lim Certified EFT & Matrix Reimprinting Practitioner
If you are experiencing the struggle over financial lack, it can be challenging to see the lessons money scarcity offers. You are in emotional struggle when you feel worry, frustration and stressed out. Many of us do find it hard to have clarity when we experience emotional overwhelm. Through this article, I hope to shed some insights that have personally helped me create a shift in my relationship with money.
For a start, it may seem impossible to will away the perception of scarcity. After all, limits are very much a natural part of our physical life. Just think about it, there is 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour and 60 seconds in one minute. You have got to finish the work that needs to be done within a certain time frame.
Then, there is also ageing and the cycle of life and death. The physical world has some kind of built-in mechanism where conditions and limits are already preset.
How do you begin to improve your relationship with money?
In this updated post, I’d like to share a way that is easy to understand and relate to. This update also covers one of the topics that I am teaching in my Relationship with Money Course.
What can be helpful is to think of a romantic relationship. And in every romantic relationship, there are stages. So, consider the different phases that a romantic relationship will go through; that is from dating to developing love and true intimacy. Next, draw on the understanding to apply it in the context of your relationship with money.
What happens if you don’t even know you have mindset blocks?
What are the signs?
To begin with, why is even important to identify whether you have mindset blocks or not?
Well, for a start, mindset blocks can keep you stuck or struggling more than you need to. It obstructs your success. A mindset block arises when you have the story of “I want to achieve this goal or dream but (the reason)”. You may even have more than one “but” on why you can’t achieve what you want.
Invariably, the reason behind the “but” stems from a limiting belief. Your “but this” or “but that” are actually excuses. Excuses are a form of self-sabotage.
Have you ever wondered what it’s like to work on clearing money blocks?
If so, I’d like to share the client notes that I have recorded down about Kay* with you. While Kay is not her real name, she is an actual person. She had first presented a situation and background, that was similar to other clients I had worked with.
Typically, when we start to work together and dig deep, we would find that much of the blocks stem from childhood. These blocks arise from memories that have been repressed for a long time. For clearing money blocks, my intent is to help clients address the root cause of their issues. As Tom Robbins, a best-selling novelist, who is often quoted says, “It is never too late to have a happy childhood.” Whatever has happened in the past, we would find that it is possible to repair their childhood wounds, turning their scars into stars that shine light!
Because the alchemy sessions are experiential, the process is an awakening of sorts. It doesn’t matter if I am conducting these sessions online or in-person. They would know that something has shifted internally; with indicative signs such as a dissolution of the sharp pain over their heart, a lifting of the heaviness in the head or a lightening of the weight on their shoulders, etc. Clients find the changes in body sensations coupled with receiving insights, as pretty much transformative!
Let’s find out what took place for Kay….
What Prompted Kay to Pursue Clearing Money Blocks
When Kay – 41-years old and mother to two young kids – first approached me, she was feeling desperate. Tears flowed down uncontrollably as she related her story. She was in a lot of emotional pain.
Kay realised that her lack of confidence and mood swings were affecting her ability to function well at work. Kay also suspected that she had huge money blocks as she often faced the pattern of having barely enough to survive even prior to marriage. She needed help to release her money blocks.
That was when I found out more of what had happened to her.
Kay was on the brink of divorce. Her asking for a divorce would have happened sooner if she had not tried to hang on for the sake of their two young kids and her worry over finances. She wanted out because she had realised that she was in a toxic relationship for a long time.
Her husband was emotionally abusive and manipulative. Over the years, while she became more interested in yoga and spirituality, he wasn’t. They had drifted apart with different interests. Their constant quarrels weighed her down.
Kay finally realised that “enough was enough” with the last argument they had. Her husband had attempted to stop her from attending meditation classes. He was against her undertaking spiritual activities that he felt was a a “waste of time” and money.
Kay desperately needed her life to change. Her situation seemed dire. Kay urgently needed to learn how to stand on her own two feet and find a more consistent source of income with financial independence. She would like to have her two kids stay with her.
Kay had to get a new home with the divorce pending. Based on her circumstances, she figured that the best she could do was to become a real estate agent. Getting out of bed to service clients on bad days was a real challenge.
Clearing Money Blocks From Childhood Issues
During the private session, Kay shared that she had felt “rejected” with the collapse of her marriage. Then again, it wasn’t a new feeling. She had been suffering from feeling lousy about herself for a long time.
When we started to work together, Kay recalled specific memories in her childhood that still bothered her today. Her parents had divorced when she was 6 years old. Their intense frequent arguments left Kay traumatised. Her mother who was aggrieved and felt bitter by the divorce, had left Kay pretty much on her own. Her 6-year old self felt alone, “unwanted”, abandoned and like a “nobody”.
Kay was in tears when she finally plucked up courage to “meet” her 6-year old. She immediately recognised her inner child who was wearing hand-me-down clothes given by her well-to-do cousins. The clothes were unfortunately too big for her small frame. She was often ridiculed in school about her dressing. Her 6-year old was looking extremely miserable.
With guidance, Kay found out that her inner child or wounded child had been holding on to hurt and pain. She also realised that her younger self had inherited the same beliefs as her mother. Her mother had the beliefs of “I am not good enough” and due to her own issues, would often reaffirm that “money is the root of all evils”.
Kay found out how the negative patterns formed quickly became a common theme in her life. She discovered why she would end up in relationships with partners who were bad for her, leaving her in debt and in dire straits. Kay also finally understood why and how she had contributed to her own marriage collapse and the core reason behind her issues with finances.
Kay realised that she had been operating in poverty consciousness all this time. She needed to change the stories that she was creating in her mind. Her realisations were deep because they were made at the subconscious level. Fortunately, it is possible to tap away the money blocks, rewrite the past and reverse the programming.
What Was Done to Help Kay
Belief Change at Subconscious Level. After Kay had understood what her lessons were, we worked on changing her beliefs at the subconscious. From “not good enough”, I helped her to install beliefs about being worthy and deserving.
Inner Child Healing. Throughout, we worked together with her inner child or wounded child to overcome her feelings of being unwanted and abandonment. The 6-year old wanted clothes that fitted her. She selected a bright yellow dress that brought out the sunshine in her personality. We worked on integrating the energetic picture of a happy child.
Change in Money Story. We cleared her old money beliefs and went on to reimprint Kay’s subconscious with a new story – one that would support her with attracting a money breakthrough and a new reality.
Resourceful State. We worked on shifting Kay into a more resourceful state. From feeling helplessness, she was able to empower herself with creative problem solving and the willingness to be open to new possibilities.
The Aftermath from Clearing Money Blocks
Collapsing the old stories that Kay once had set her free. She experienced shifts as she released her emotional disruptions. From having embraced her inner child, she tuned into a sense of “coming home”. (I equate this to being self-love that she had integrated – a return to wholeness.)
Kay was happy to have worked on clearing money blocks through releasing her childhood pain. In fact, as she discovered, she was no longer as bothered about her financial situation. She was less uptight over things and felt more at ease with herself.
I was delighted to hear from Kay a few weeks later when she reported that she’s been attracting new prospects. The installation of the belief that she is “good enough” had helped to improve her self-esteem. She was able to go for networking events to promote her services confidently.
Kay worked hard both externally and internally through processing her resistances. She went on to selling three properties with a lot less struggle. That gave her enough assurance that she could be independent. She was able to afford rent and to move out to a new apartment after 4 months.
My Thoughts
All in, I was happy to have helped Kay. It was great that she took responsibility and committed to working on herself for clearing money blocks. Kay is now in a more resourceful state to deal with ongoing life challenges. I’m proud of how far she has come. That’s empowerment for her!!
Much love, Evelyn Lim Abundance Coach for Women in Business
