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Why Think About Death For a Life That Matters

“In the end, these things matter most: How well did you love? How fully did you live? How deeply did you let go?” – Buddha

buddha quote: three things that matter most

Do you avoid thinking about death? It can seem morbid at first but according to some scientific studies, thinking about death in a specific and personal way can make a person value and appreciate life more fully. Not forgetting too is Steven Covey’s advice about beginning with the end in mind. So if we are to take the advice and project to the furthest, we will be thinking about death.

Death is often perceived as the end. But death in this life does not mean that your consciousness dies. In fact it is a passage into a different state of consciousness. You can read more about this from the book by its commonly known title, The Tibetan Book of the Dead. The text is the most famous literature of Tibetan Buddhism. While many view it as a guide for afterlife, the book actually offers a guide for life in preparation for death. (You may just feel compelled to double up your meditation practice after reading it).

To ask you to think about death is essentially a call for you to put some conscious thought about your current life. Thinking about death triggers you to recall about how life has been like for you. Here is also where you take stock of your accomplishments, successes and failures. You look into your past for lessons and you resolve to live differently from now, in order to experience a more positive future.

What It Means To Take Stock

“If you want to know how to live your life, think about what you’d like people to say about you after you die. And live backwards.”
– anonymous

I am sure that you have watched this scene at least once on TV or in the movies being played: a person expressing tremendous regret while lying on the deathbed. It may also be something that you have witnessed yourself with a loved one. In fact, such scenes are powerful motivators for the many who go on to creating bucket lists.

Through not wanting to live in regret, you will realize that it is time to let go of petty quarrels. Or even the big ones. You begin to see it is not worth wining the battle but losing the relationship. The battle is the heated argument you had with your spouse or mother this morning. And you take the important step of repairing wounds and healing scars before you lose the relationship to regret.

You also begin to realize who are the important people in your life. All the material pursuits cannot take the place of experiencing love. Nothing matters more than truly living from the heart. You also would like to leave a legacy based on love.

Thus, you make the choice immediately. After all, it does not make any sense to carry any unnecessary baggage and cause yourself more misery for the remaining half of your life. You also decide to stop complaining, whining and blaming; but find ways to live more joyfully in the present. Each moment counts towards the end.

You Decide What Matters Most

One of the greatest failures in life is the failure to participate in life – fully! – Abundance Tapestry

A life worth living is one without regrets for sure. Indeed, thinking about death helps you to consider what does living a life without regrets mean. This can mean differently to everyone. It can mean that you have done all the things that you have wanted to do. It can mean saying sorry to all the people that you have wronged. Or it can mean that forgiving your parents for a tortured past.

A life that matters is one filled with meaning. Victor Frankl shares in his book, Man’s Search for Meaning, that our primary drive in life is not pleasure but to discover personal meaning. It was what kept him alive while he labored in four different Nazi concentration camps between 1942 and 1945 and what he discovered true of survivors.

Former US President, Woodrow Wilson talked about living richly. He once said,

“You are not here merely to make a living. You are here to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, and with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world. You impoverish yourself if you forget this errand.”

From Steve Jobs perspective, it boils down to following your heart….

“Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Almost everything – all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”

From Buddha’s perspective, it is about loving unconditionally, living fully and letting go deeply. Applying these three tenets lead you to freedom – your entry into nirvana.

Your Turn Now

And so, what is it for you?

In the comments box below, please share your thoughts and reflections about living a life that matters.

Love and abundance always,

evelyn lim signature
Author. Adventurer. Life Coach. More About Me.

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The Life Vision Mastery Program includes an exercise for inner reflection about living a meaningful life. You learn more about developing a vision with the desired end to this life in mind. Ultimately, through choosing to live consciously, you build a life that matters. Click the banner below…


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kevina Geoffrey - July 31, 2012 Reply

To me living a life that matters beginning from the end (that is with the thoughts of death).
Is living ones life with continual compunction of heart. Thereby, one sees the need for self development.

Also *enduring labor, pain and fearing no kind of austerity.

*Thomas `A Kempis

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Evelyn Reply:

Hi there,

Thanks for sharing your views.

I believe that pain, in many circumstances, can be optional. There is no need to suffer unnecessarily but in reality, most of us do create psychological pain for ourselves. And it is through experiencing contrast that lets us know where we would like to shift towards.

Wishing you much love and joy always,
Evelyn

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Truthfully – People Who Meditate Are Nicer - July 31, 2012 Reply

[…] Not only are we kinder. We are more likely to give blood, carry donor cards, be empathic to a homele…tp://www.articlesbase.com/authors/mark-oh/1131832">Mark […]

Rick Carter Stress Judo Coaching - August 1, 2012 Reply

Evelyn,
This is a refreshing variation on the “live each day like it’s your last” semi-cliche. I am in charge of a team in my office, and I tell them constantly that the enduring quality of their work and their relationships is the most important goal. It’s true that we are replaceable but our reputations and character are not. Thank you for an important and unique message.
Rick Carter

[Reply]

Evelyn Reply:

Thank you, Rick, for your comments and sharing with me about what you tell your team. You sure sound like an inspiring leader.

I’d say that it is the essence of who you are that creates the legacy. It is not in a label or name but it is your spirit, when you shine from the soul.

Love and abundance always,
Evelyn

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Hannah - August 3, 2012 Reply

Dear Evelyn
I am absolutely loving the Life Vision Mastery course and feel that I am already so much closer to knowing what my vision looks and feels like. I started it from a place of not knowing where I was going in life. Now I know that I want to see my future self at the end of my years feeling content and at peace and joyful that I worked out what my passion and purpose was. I think you are so brilliant and talented and I wholeheartedly recommend this course! Magic!

[Reply]

Evelyn Reply:

Hello Hannah,

I am so happy for you. I am glad to know that you have worked out your passion and purpose. I know how it feels like to go through a period of non-clarity.

Thank you for your feedback. I am absolutely thrilled that you have found my course a great benefit.

Love and abundance always,
Evelyn

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Cathy | Treatment Talk - August 4, 2012 Reply

Hi Evelyn,

Great reminder to look at death as a reminder to live our life to the fullest. I read once if you spend some time visualizing your passing and how people will feel and what they will say, you will have a better understanding of how important it is to follow your dreams. Thank you for sharing! Have a wonderful weekend.

[Reply]

Evelyn Reply:

Hello Cathy,

Oh yes, in the Life Vision Mastery Program, one of the exercises that you do is to visualize your passing and to write an eulogy. I provide some guides and frameworks for writing the eulogy for those with no idea how to start.

Have a brilliant weekend,
Evelyn

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J.D. Meier - August 5, 2012 Reply

Beautiful choice of quote to set the stage.

I am a fan of reflection, and I think looking back, often helps us see forward.

One of the ways I shape my life forward is I use the metaphor that I am the author of my life, and I choose my stories, a day at a time, a moment at a time. In this way, I write my story.

[Reply]

Evelyn Reply:

Hello J.D.,

I like the metaphor of being an author to our own life script. We want to be the ones writing this and not someone else do the job for us.

Have a most fantastic weekend,
Evelyn

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Galen Pearl - August 6, 2012 Reply

Someone told me that death is our greatest friend and adviser. Making peace with death allows us to live fully.

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