Discover Your 5 Ancient Mirrors of Relationship

“Key #19: Our true beliefs are mirrored in our most intimate relationships.” – Gregg Braden in The Divine Matrix: Bridging Time, Miracles, Space and Belief

“Life is a mirror and will reflect back to the thinker what he thinks into it.” – Ernest Holmes

(Photo taken: Singapore Botanic Gardens)

Our inner world gets mirrored in our outer world. What we truly think ultimately gets mirrored in how our relationships are like. Our true beliefs come from our subconscious – rather than the conscious – mind. And so we may have no conscious awareness that we are holding a certain belief. Hence, to know what our core beliefs are, we just need to investigate how our life has been like.

In Gregg Braden’s The Divine Matrix, he shares about the Five Ancient Mirrors of Relationship. I find an understanding of it helpful when we start to analyze the mirrors of our own lives. According to Coptic, Gnostic and Essene spiritual texts, we are shown a series of mirrors that we will face at some point in our lives. The Five Ancient Mirrors of Relationship are listed in the order that we usually learn them. We recognize the most obvious ones and allow the deeper ones to emerge in time. The Five Ancient Mirrors of Relationship are as follows:

The First Mirror: Reflections of the Moment

Reflections of the moment rests on the observation that “mirrors are everywhere”. With deeper analysis, you can realize that two seemingly disparate events are actually connected with an underlying pattern. Hence, if you are having a specific belief, it is likely that it is being reflected in your major life areas all at the same time.

The mirror of the moment is on real-time. It reflects your true beliefs. When you are able to identify the core belief, you will be able to heal from the negative pattern that affects every part of your life.

A common belief that gets reflected is “I am a victim”. Unfortunately, one of my girlfriends has this as a deep-rooted belief. She keeps complaining about feeling victimized every time I meet her for coffee. Her belief is manifested in life areas such as work, relationship and health all at once. Nothing seems to go on well, over the 5 years I have known her.

The Second Mirror: Reflections of What We Judge in the Moment

For reflections on judgment, you are to ask what is the common reflection that the people in your life are showing you through their actions. The common reflection might not be about your belief but what you judge in others. You will find yourself attracting people with the trait or behavior that you are strongly averse to.

Daniel is someone who has a strong sense of integrity. And yet, he would attract business relationships with people who lack this quality. When the relationships eventually broke down, they had major implications both financially and psychologically.

Reading the explanation in Gregg’s book gave me a deeper understanding to his experience. I now understand why this could be the case: for Daniel has had a heightened aversion to those who play politics. Outspoken, he had previously stepped on the toes of some well-placed people.

To analyze the second mirror on its implications for yourself, you will need to ask yourself what traits and characteristics irritate you like crazy. It is only when you release your judgment on these that you will experience a shift in your inner state, and consequently, your relationships with others. With the release, you will find yourself attracting less and less of the relationships or situations that reflect the original judgment.

I dare say that when you investigate into some of the things that bother you with your spouse or family members, you will be able to unearth a fair amount of insights. The closest relationships or those with blood ties are usually the ones that drive you nuts. An understanding of the second mirror will help you to improve your relationships. When you no longer judge – but accept them for who they are – you experience a profound shift. Thus, instead of bitter complaints, you can only thank them for helping you in your growth and transformation.

The Third Mirror: Reflections of What we Have Lost, Given Away or Had Taken Away from Us

Essentially, the third mirror reflects the parts that are “missing” in you, and so you are hoping to find them in others in order to fill the empty spaces inside yourself. Invariably, you find yourself drawn to relationships with people that make up the quality that you desire but do not believe you have. With the mirror of loss, you begin to discover why you feel attracted to certain friends.

Gregg proposes that you ask yourself the question, “what do I see in this person that I’ve lost in myself, given away or had taken away from me.” The investigation may warrant mentally going back to your childhood days to find out what parts about yourself that you have abandoned, lost or given away. These events have left you traumatized, vulnerable and hurt. And so you have grown up….*gasp*…feeling un-whole.

With the third mirror, you are able to gain the insight that you have been on the search for wholeness and that you have created situations to fill the missing gaps. Which brings to mind when I think of people who are willing to stay on in unhealthy abusive relationships. What is to be realized is that these are the parts that are never truly gone. They are a part of your soul. To become whole, you are to reclaim your power through acceptance, compassion and love.

The Fourth Mirror: Reflections of Our Dark Night of the Soul

The Dark Night of the Soul refers to a time where your life situation reflects your worst fears. You experience it as a period of darkness. When it happens, you feel as if you are sinking into an abyss. You are presented with a situation that requires you to make a major overhaul. Unfortunately, the more you resist the change, the worse the situation will unravel. Sadly, it was also what happened to my friend, Arch.

The tests often come at unexpected times. I find that it usually happens during a period when the ego gets too strong or at time when negative emotions are about to erupt from an over accumulation over the years. It may take a seemingly innocent event to trigger the catastrophe. And once triggered, it can be a string of events.

At this juncture, it is easy to point blame at others for their role in causing our experience of darkness. However, the only way out is to take responsibility. With the understanding of the fourth mirror, we are to confront our fears. We are to address the negative emotions that we have been suppressing. The good news is that once we released these effectively, our nightmares with these fears will stop. With no such nightmares haunting our dreams, we would not be manifesting the situations in our physical reality.

The Fifth Mirror: Reflections of Our Greatest Act of Compassion

The fifth mirror is really about our imperfections. Let’s admit to this: we are our toughest critics. So we need to ask ourselves: Are we in self-rejection? What is it in ourselves that we have been finding so hard to accept? Has our life journey been one of trying to fix our imperfections?

One great example is about those of us who are in search of looking perfect. We go for multiple beauty treatments, some of which may even be invasive. We are never quite satisfied with our looks. We have an image of perfection that we could not quite measure up to.

Through the mirror, we are to learn about accepting ourselves as we are. We learn about being compassionate towards self. Within the folds of imperfection, we are able to see the perfection of it all. We are complete at the soul-level.

In Conclusion

A few days ago, I watched Snow white and the Huntsman. We had missed it in the cinemas earlier this year and so I decided to borrow the movie in DVD for my kids. Well, I ended up watching the show together with them at home.

I have found that what gets reiterated is that mirrors are very powerful in that they reveal to you the truth as-is. It is when we reject the truth by reacting in resistance, that there could be severe consequences. In the movie, The Evil Queen would ask the mirror who the fairest of them all is. No surprises; she goes through a horrible end.

Let’s spend some thing doing mirror work. There are plenty of benefits. An investigation through our own mirrors helps us to gain personal mastery. We learn what our life lessons are. We learn to discern the underlying patterns that have caused us much disruption. Amazingly, once we have solved the mystery, we no longer manifest the same pattern that gets reflected in every part of our life.

Love and abundance always,

Author. Adventurer. Life Coach. More About Me.

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Share About Your Mirrors

Any thoughts about the mirrors of life? What life lessons have you learned from them? Please share in the comments below.

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