How to Release Your Public Speaking Anxiety and the Fear of Making Live Presentations

Do you suffer from public speaking anxiety or the fear of making live presentations?

Does the thought of doing public speaking or making live presentations (such as on FB, Instagram or Youtube) cause you to sweat in nervousness, feel faint or get nauseous?

Do the voices inside your head tell you that it is not safe, not to make a fool of yourself or not to embarrass yourself in public?

First of all, what’s the deal with Public Speaking or Speaking in Front of an Audience?

Public speaking anxiety has been listed as American’s #1 fear affliction, before death at #5, and loneliness, weighing in at #7. This potentially means that most of us are less afraid of dying alone than of making fools of ourselves in front of others. The findings are thought-provoking, aren’t they?

Well, not just public speaking, many of us have the fear of being judged should we decide to reveal our “failures” and “mistakes” in the stories that we share before others. The voices inside our heads will warn us that it’s highly dangerous to reveal about our painful past in front of others! The fear of rejection or non-acceptance can be so strong that we are inclined NOT to show up as ourselves or to draw attention to our struggles (even if they could be over years ago).

Here’s the thing. If we would like to create a difference, it’s inevitable that we have to do some form of sharing our authentic stories. A presentation can never be quite as impactful without the power of story-telling. Real life stories connect and build bridges with our audience.

Let’s recognise that there is NOTHING shameful about sharing that we have gone through struggles.

Everyone has at one point or another, been through a difficult period. Without the struggles, there wouldn’t be us today. By sharing your authentic story, you are better able to connect with your audience and inspire them to action. In fact, the more emotionally compelling, the better. Facts tell, but stories sell!

Dealing with public speaking anxiety or the fear of standing in front of others may not be everyone’s cup of tea. Less so, should you claim to be an introvert (just like me). You are not likely to want to sign up for something that will make you feel uncomfortable. If I’m guessing right, you’ve got the tendency to hide every time when is an invitation to be interviewed, present or speak.

Chances are you can remain like this for years.

But if you are aware enough, you may recognise that you’ve been playing small.

Should you wish to increase your reach, create an impact and make a bigger difference, making live presentations with authentic sharing of your story can be life-changing. You are challenged to go beyond your comfort zone. What’s more, we are now in the era of publishing videos to get our messages out there.

Just imagine brimming with confidence when you have released any public speaking anxiety or fear of making a live presentation!

My Story with Releasing Public Speaking Anxiety

When I was to share my authentic story in a presentation on stage for the first time, I felt extremely nervous. I have never done anything like this before. It’s one thing to host a workshop, appear “live” on social media but quite another to reveal about my painful struggles on stage and in front of a large group of strangers.

I was imagining scenarios like:
– what if I trip on stage,
– what if I forget my lines,
– what if I blank out,
– what if I could not connect with my audience etc.

My mind was on overdrive. I also started to brandish myself for signing up for a public speaking gig, when I could have just stayed in my comfort zone.

Who am I to think that I can give a talk?
I’m just too old for this kind of thing.
I will look horrible on stage.
I will sound horrible on stage.

The voices inside my head was clear in that public speaking and telling my story on stage would be such a “bad idea”. 

Fortunately, I had enough awareness to know what the negative voices inside my head were doing. At one point, I had two parts of me in an inner debate. Finally, I reasoned that I wasn’t looking for safety anymore. Instead, I really wanted to break through my barriers.

I had written the introduction of my script for my presentation as follows….

“I believe in the power of stories and the most powerful stories are the ones we tell ourselves……for they create our reality.”

As I read through my script, I realised that my presentation is not just about the past. It is about the present. Therein was another wonderful opportunity to change the story that I was telling on the inside. I proceeded to work on releasing false beliefs and to visualise myself speaking confidently on stage.

Finally the day of the event arrived.

None – absolutely none – of the negative scenarios that I was imagining about came true. No falling down on stage, no forgetting my lines or blanking out when the stage lights came on. Instead, I spoke from my heart. The words just flowed.

On stage, I shared about how I once struggled with feeling unlovable and lousy about myself. Then, I went on to share about how I eventually turned my scars into stars,  stress into breakthrough and my mess into a compelling message. Well, I was happy to receive positive feedback on my presentation. A total relief that it was well received…hurray!!

What made the entire experience awesome was also the chance to help fellow entrepreneurs who had signed up for the same public speaking gig. A number of them had jitters and struggled with piecing their stories together prior to the event. Together, we worked on kicking their fears and crafting their messages. It was awesome finally hearing them speak on stage with poise and confidence! A breakthrough for their branding and market positioning indeed!

How to Release Public Speaking Anxiety and Fears

Need tips for your public speaking event or a live presentation?

Here are some tips that had worked for myself and those that I had assisted….
1. Become aware of what the voices are saying.
2. Realise that some of the imagined future scenarios that are negative may never come true.
3. Release any negative emotions and false beliefs via EFT or meridian tapping or any other energy healing techniques.
4. Visualise the desired outcome. Repeatedly.
5. Apply actions or put in practice that will help lead to a positive outcome. Eg. practice in front of your friends, join a Toastmasters Club, recording your voice and replaying the audio.

Hopefully the above tips can help you too!

Even if you are an introvert, you can release any public speaking anxiety. Recently, to my surprise, I also found out that there are many master speakers with the ability to speak powerfully and make high ticket sales from stage and who profess to being introverts. Hence, don’t let your fears hold you back from being the best that you can be!

Kick Your Fears and Get Ready To Play a Bigger Game!

Do you have any one of the following
– a confidence crisis
– inner challenges that prevent you from showing up,
– deep-rooted traumas that cause you to stutter, go blank in the mind, – tremble at any thought of public speaking, and/or
– issues with sharing your authentic story without needing anyone else’s approval?

Maybe you are not hoping to be the best speaker in town. Maybe it’s just about getting to the next step of your growth. Maybe it’s about levelling up to improve your game.

What will breaking free from your fears do for you? I’m betting that you’d feel a sense of freedom, greater confidence and fulfilment from getting your message out there!

Well, if you need further assistance to
– release public speaking anxiety
– create a bigger impact or/and
– turn shame into authentic and powerful sharing of your story and
crafting your branding message,
apply for a complimentary call here.

I’d be glad to assist you with a map for your breakthrough.

Love and abundance always,
Evelyn Lim

P.S. Share your thoughts in the comments below.

5 Positive Archetypes of the Divine Feminine for Sacred Self-Discovery

What do archetypes have to do with awakening your Divine Feminine and why is this important?
Also, is any talk on Divine Feminine hocus pocus and how does this apply to the modern day woman?
Well, allow me to explain why you would want to dive deeper into the topic of archetypes of the Divine Feminine for sacred self-discovery.

For a start, awakening your Divine Feminine is important because you wouldn’t want to have gender-related beliefs holding you back from drawing on your sacred womanly gifts and being the best that you can be. Beliefs that do not serve you include the following: women should be of the inferior sex, girls can only be seen and not heard, or that women are only meant to just sew or cook. You’d be surprised how many of us continue to hold such beliefs.

It’s been a struggle for many women to align with their highest potential. The Divine Feminine has been suppressed for years until recently. Women have no or little rights to speak, express or show up throughout history. Even in modern times, many women continue to live in a paradigm that is outdated and that no longer supports our growth.

Awakening your Divine Feminine is nothing mystical. Nor is it a New Age fad. After all, it’s your birthright to live as you are. In your true nature. You are able to draw on your feminine traits, strengths and gifts. It’s an awesome feeling, being in the space where you own yourself fully.

For a long time, I had found it difficult to speak, express or show up confidently. It was only when I dug deep that I realised how I had bought into beliefs that disempower women. These beliefs were embedded into my psyche and affected the choices and decisions I made. The self-realisation hit hard and it was painful before I could free myself from the layers of falsehood.

Having helped other women through my coaching and healing services, I became aware of the vast and negative consequences of not reclaiming our Divine Feminine. They include the following:
– Low confidence and poor self-esteem
– The subject of emotional and physical abuse
– Depression
– Inability to shine at work
– Slower progress in job promotion
– Unable to go for what we desire and so on.

Conversely, when you live in fullness of your Divine Feminine, you are able to lead confidently from power.  Living in fullness means having to reclaim parts that you have abandoned or ignored. It starts with self-discovery. Self-discovery offers you the opportunity to set the conscious intent of breaking free from the limitations you have imposed on yourself just because you are female.

I recommend incorporating an exploration into archetypal patterns so that you can reclaim your Divine Feminine. Go through each pattern in turn and align with the positive attributes. You can begin your self-discovery journey by journaling on archetypes with this guide here!

What is the Meaning of Archetype?

According to Jungian psychology, an archetype is a collectively-inherited unconscious idea, pattern of thought, image, etc., that is universally present, in individual psyches.

The 5 Archetypes of the Divine Feminine

(1) Creator or Earth Mother

The Creator Mother within the soul of a Divine Feminine is like Earth. She has maternal instincts which makes her very caring. As a Mother, she nourishes with milk and she sustains life. Through her womb, a mother allows the merging of the masculine and feminine energy for creation to happen. She is akin to a Midwife, facilitating birth.

(2) Sensual Lover

Sensuality is the ability to fully experience the senses, without apology or restraint. The sense of smell, taste, touch, and vision combine to awaken her body. She is also a Sensual Lover who unites her energy with her masculine partner as ONE.

(3) Sacred Healer

The Divine Feminine is a Sacred Healer, whose loving and caring nature helps to heal relationships. She heals through her heart and soul. Her innate nature is full of grace. She is connected to water for emotional management.

(4) Wise Sage

The Divine Feminine is a Wise Sage, using her intuition to guide her for decision making and for navigating life. She senses energy, whether consciously or unconsciously, and is able to tell if something feels off or not right.

(5) Leader or the Warrioress

In a state of balance, the Divine Feminine is calm and therefore, not a chronic worrier but a Warrioress. As a Warriorress, she is able to handle her multiple responsibilities, deal with challenges and gets things done. She holds things together for her family and loved ones of whom she fiercely protects.

The Divine Feminine leads with creative power. It does not necessarily mean that she needs to be artistic. Her nature allows her to be receptive and to be open to ideas. Thus, she is able to work on the ideas for problem solving or for creating her best work. 

Her gifts help her to carve out unique work for herself. Thus, she does not need to be in a co-dependent relationship. Most certainly, the modern woman does not have to rely on her partner to create a source of living. She has what it takes to succeed. Success is hers when she deems herself worthy.

Drawing on Your Positive Archetypal Traits

“We will discover the nature of our particular genius when we stop trying to conform to our own or to other people’s models, learn to be ourselves, and allow our natural channel to open.” Shakti Gawain

Connecting with your Divine Feminine requires you to be courageous to own who you are. There is no need for you to conform to the standards held by any masculine-led community. On the contrary, you are ready to overcome any fear of rejection.

“I was once afraid of people saying “Who does she think she is? Now I have the courage to stand and say, “This is who I am.” Oprah Winfrey

The more you know yourself, the more you are able to peel off the layers of falsehood. You realise that you have been living in an illusion and you no longer wish to do so. As you become more authentic to your true nature, you’d find it easier to shine your core brilliance. In my book Self-Discovery Journal for Women, I provided writing prompts so that you can reclaim yourself.

Align with the Positive Archetypes of the Divine Feminine NOW

There is a cost to waiting if you are not seeing the urgency in awakening your Divine Feminine. The earlier you reclaim and celebrate yourself, the easier it would be to step into the best that you can be. You will be free of any beliefs that erodes your confidence as a woman.

“The Divine Feminine understands that even as her body ages, she does not need to resort to invasive procedures to keep her youth or be worried that she has now lines to show. Nor does she need to fear losing her man because she is older. She has enough self-confidence to know that she is still beautiful from the inside-out.” Self-Discovery Journal for Women: 250 Questions and Writing Prompts to Awaken Your Divine Feminine

I’ve personally seen how women were able to shine quickly after achieving a breakthrough from reclaiming lost parts of themselves. My clients had reported improved well-being and better success rates as soon as we work together. When they finally own who they are, their life magically changes!

It can happen for you too. Your feminine gifts are presented to you at the soul. Claim who you are NOW!

May you lead your best life, in full awareness of your divinity and true nature!

Love and abundance always,
Evelyn Lim
Life Coach for Women Entrepreneurs

Resources:
1. Self-Discovery Journal for Women: 250 Quhestions and Writing Prompts to Awaken Your Divine Feminine
2. Get an akashic soul reading for sacred self-discovery here!
3. Apply for a clarity call to get from stuck to breakthrough.

P.S. Enjoyed this article? Feel free to share it on social media. Thank you in advance.

P.S.S. Share your thoughts and comments below 🙂

How to Awaken Your Divine Feminine When You Have Lost Yourself

You will need to awaken your Divine Feminine if you have lost yourself.

Losing yourself can happen in various ways. One big way is when you have lost yourself in your multiple roles – as a wife, mother, lover, friend, leader and so on. At the root, you could have beliefs that stop you from connecting with your female energy and shining your core brilliance.

Born female, you could have been taught that you are of the inferior sex to males. You were told that you are to play more of a supporting role. And that you have little or less right to be heard. Invariably, you give your power away.

Thus, your Divine Feminine gets hidden, forgotten and suppressed. Over time, you become increasingly disconnected with her. When you diminish yourself as a female, you feel less attractive and if I guess right, will have difficulties with loving and accepting yourself unconditionally. Aligning with your highest potential becomes challenging. You are unable to hold your own even when you need to show up confidently.

Should this be true, you are not alone.

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Empath Traits: 30 Signs to Tell if You Have Them

Are you an empath or have empath traits?

Do you tend to get extremely exhausted after going to crowded areas?

Have you ever met someone for the first time and immediately feel an ache in your body…and sometime later, find out that this person is having physical symptoms in the same areas in his or her body?

Do you often feel a sharp pain in your heart as another person shares about her struggles with you?

Have you ever an unexplained wave of negative energy when visiting a new place such that you feel sick immediately?

If any of the above is true, you may be someone with empath traits.

The above examples appear in my family, friends, clients and most of all, myself!

After reflecting on my own experiences and knowing others who have them, I realise that I know a fair bit about what life for one having empath traits is like.

What’s Life Like for You with Empath Traits

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10 Signs of Money Phobia

Could you be having a money phobia problem? When dealing with personal financial matters, do you approach them calmly or do you tend to avoid them? What’s it like for you when it comes to filing tax, for instance? Do you start to feel dizzy, sweat profusely or sick in the stomach?

It was not clear to me that I had huge money phobias, at first. It would even sound ridiculous since I had worked in a bank for many years previously. There was a stage when I had to handle lots of physical cash when serving high net-worth individuals. Later on, I realised that while I was able to advise others on what to do about their investment portfolio, it was different when it comes to handling personal money matters.

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Your Wake-up Call from the Universe

All of a sudden, it hits you that the Universe has just given you a wake-up call. It is an “aha” moment. A moment that dawns on you. It’s as if you have been asleep all this time until you discover that the answer that you seek has been staring in your face!

Prior to the sudden awareness, you may have been stressed out. You wondered about how matters have come to be. Despite tremendous effort on your part, things – at their worst – have turned out to be a mess. And so, you questioned, if God or the Universe has abandoned you?

A major life crisis such as retrenchment, bankruptcy, financial struggle, a health crisis and/or relationship breakdowns may NOT be exactly what you had in mind. Yet, you could have been dealt with a situation that has brought about much emotional turmoil. Anger. Struggle. Sadness. Loneliness. It’s like going through the dark night of your soul. Continue reading

Life Lessons That Will Turn Your Life Around

Life lessons are experiences to help us grow and evolve. They aren’t always pretty when we first encounter them. In fact, it is often the case that if we don’t learn them, we are likely to find ourselves going through the same negative situation over and over again.

Hence, if you are caught in repeated patterns, it helps to ask yourself what are the life lessons you are meant to learn.

I recall crying out in frustration, complaining in bitterness and reeling in pain over negative experiences that are of the same patterns in the past. A string of broken relationships. A stack of failures. A series of bad calls. It was only when I saw the light and chose to act differently that the same patterns stopped occurring.

I would like to share the life lessons that were written by Maya Angelou who was an American poet, singer, memoirist, and civil rights activist. Her words had made me stop to reflect. They were helpful reminders that life is happening FOR me, rather than to me. Perhaps, reading them for a start can do the same for you too.Continue reading

30 Positive Affirmations for Highest Potential

What positive affirmations for highest potential would be great to use if you are hoping to step into a picture of success?

While mentoring spiritual entrepreneurs, I have had a few of them share that they struggle with knowing what words to say or what to affirm when they are doing tapping or some other work that helps them with belief change. They would like to shift into a paradigm that supports their growth and success. However, what has kept them stuck was at the “words” part. And so, they wanted to find out how to overcome this problem.

Well, if you are having the same issue, here are some answers.

It takes practice and repeatedly reading and saying positive affirmations. Having a list of positive affirmations to start off with can help. In my post, I have laid out 30 positive affirmations for highest potential that you can apply. If you are in need for a guide, do bookmark this page!Continue reading

21 Excuses That Make Up Your Money Story

Is the money story that you have been telling actually a cover-up?

Could the reason that you have been giving for the lack of a financial breakthrough be really an excuse?

Your money story may be a cover that you have created for helping you avoid pain or to playing small. Or it could be that your ego needs to know that it is not diminished in any way. The excuses that you tell is your way out to feeling justified in your behaviour or the results you have been getting.

All of us have, at some point, made excuses. We give excuses to explain our behaviour, current situation or why we have to decline and say “no” to an invitation. We may feel obliged to give an excuse sometimes not to hurt the other party.

But what happens when you give excuses to explain away a choice that you are making, even if it one that keeps you small and does not move you positively forward?

“Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses.” – George Washington Carver

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What is Past Life Therapy? A FAQ Guide On Releasing The Past

Wondering if you should go for a past life therapy?

Perhaps you have got an inkling that the negative patterns that you are currently having stem from blocks that were created in past lives.

It’s not as if you have not tried to address your issues. You may have gone for some childhood therapy or counselling sessions, yet you are still stuck or feeling blocked. The same patterns keep repeating.

One great analogy is that you’ve been told not to touch a boiling kettle but you can’t stop yourself from doing so. Hence, you have to contend with burning your fingers over and over again. If anything, that you keep facing the same patterns is a sign that your issues are not fully resolved.

You are now thinking that perhaps your issues have a root cause from way back. If there is such a thing as past lives, you suspect that your issues could have started even prior to this incarnation. Then again, you can’t help but feel some doubt arising: is the thing about past life spiritual woo-woo?

Well, allow me to de-mystify what a past life therapy is. Find out what transformative shifts can happen during a session. Learn how you can finally address the root cause of your current life blocks and stop self-sabotaging patterns from repeating.
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